Quick answer
After a floorball game, say something short, warm and unrelated to the result: "I loved watching you play" or "Did you have fun?" Then give your child time. Leave tactics, mistakes and refereeing to the coach, and wait until the next day, or until your child asks, before you talk about the match itself. Children want to feel that your love does not depend on the scoreboard.
Key takeaways
- The first words after the final whistle matter most. Choose warmth over analysis.
- Do not coach from the sideline or in the car. The coach's job is tactics; yours is support.
- Ask open questions ("What was your favourite moment?") instead of closed ones ("Why did you miss?").
- Give the child 30 minutes, a snack and quiet before any conversation about the game.
- Praise effort and choices, not goals. Children control effort; they do not control the score.
- A short home session the next day is a great way to turn a bad game into something useful.
Why do the first words after the game matter so much?
Straight after a match, a child is tired, emotional and often disappointed. Even a win brings pressure ("Did I play well enough?"). Anything a parent says in those first minutes is heard through that filter. A comment such as "You should have shot there" feels like a verdict, not a tip.
I have coached youth players for years, and the pattern is the same everywhere. Children who feel safe after games play looser, take more chances and learn faster. Children who dread the car ride home start to play not to make mistakes, which is the opposite of what a developing player needs.
What should you say instead? A quick guide
| Instead of this | Say this | Why it works |
|---|---|---|
| "Why didn't you shoot?" | "I love watching you play." | It sends love, not pressure |
| "You should have passed to number 7." | "What was your favourite moment today?" | The child chooses what to talk about |
| "That referee was terrible." | "The referee has a hard job too." | Models respect and keeps focus on the player |
| "We lost because..." | "Floorball is a team game. You all worked hard." | Removes blame from the individual |
| "You were the best player on the court." | "I saw you encourage your teammate. That was great." | Praises behaviour the child controls |
| "Why can't you finish like the others?" | "Want a snack? We can talk later if you like." | Gives time and space |
Notice that none of the replies in the middle column mention the score. After a loss that is exactly the point.
What about the car ride home?
The car is where most parents slip, because it is a closed space and the child cannot leave. Try a simple rule: for the first ten minutes of the drive, nobody talks about the match unless the child starts. Put music on, ask about food, or just drive. If your child does start talking, listen first. Ask "What do you think?" before you offer an opinion, and try not to turn every sentence into advice.
If the game went badly and your child is upset, name the feeling instead of fixing it. "That looked hard. I am sorry it felt tough" is enough. Tomorrow, once the feelings have settled, you can ask what they would like to practise.
Coach Erik's tip: Use the "24-hour rule" with your players and parents. Technical feedback waits 24 hours. In the first day after a game, only emotions and food are discussed. Most of the problems I see disappear when parents follow this one habit.
How do you praise well?
Praise that is specific, honest and about things the child controls builds confidence. "You kept your head up and found the free player" is far more useful than "Great game!" because the child knows what to repeat. Avoid comparing with teammates or with the opposition. Children notice, and it creates rivalry inside the team.
Also avoid praising only goals. In floorball, plenty of valuable actions never show up on the score sheet: a good first touch, a pass that opens the court, winning the ball along the boards (the low wall around the court), or a quick return to defend. If you learn to spot these, your child learns that they matter too.
How can you turn a bad game into a positive next step?
When your child is ready, usually the next day, offer a small and fun practice session instead of a conversation. Play, do not lecture. Fifteen minutes in the garden, garage or hallway often says more than any talk. If the problem was passing under pressure, a passer lets your child repeat the skill again and again without anyone watching. The Extreme Floorball Passer (€129) returns the ball predictably, so a child can get 100 passes and receptions in a short session. If the problem was control, the Extreme Floorball Stickhandling Trainer (€69) gives a playful challenge in a very small space.
The passer and the stickhandling trainer are Made in Europe, and Better Floorball, a Swedish brand, designs them in Sweden and tests them for maximum durability. But the equipment is only a tool. The real aim is to show your child that mistakes are material to work with, not a reason to be ashamed.
A simple, low-pressure routine could look like this:
- Ask: "Is there anything you would like to practise this week?" Accept the answer, even if it is not what you would choose.
- Do 5 minutes of free play with the ball, with no instructions.
- Pick one skill and do 3 rounds of 20 touches or passes.
- Finish with something your child is good at, so the session ends on a success.
Cue: ask, do not tell. Watch for: a child who goes quiet or says "I'm fine", which usually means it is time to stop and play something else.
What should you leave to the coach?
Positioning, line changes, tactics, who plays where and the referee's decisions are the coach's domain. If you disagree, talk to the coach privately at another time, never in front of the team and never at the match. A child who hears two different instructions, one from the coach and one from a parent, becomes uncertain and stops trusting their own decisions. Sharing a positive word with the coach, such as "thank you for the session", also helps the team culture.
For more on supporting a young player over a season, see our guide on how to support your floorball child.
Common mistakes
Replaying the game on the way home
Going through every missed chance leaves the child feeling analysed. Fix: keep the first ten minutes free of match talk, and ask what they enjoyed.
Coaching from the sideline
Shouting instructions contradicts the coach and makes the child look to the parent instead of the game. Fix: cheer, clap and let the coach coach.
Blaming the referee or the team-mates
Blame teaches children that results are someone else's fault. Fix: talk about effort and what the team can learn.
Rewarding only wins or goals
Children then link love and treats to results. Fix: give the same warm response after a loss as after a win.
Comparing with other players
Comparisons damage confidence and friendships. Fix: compare the child only with their own progress from a few weeks ago.
FAQ
What should I say to my child after a floorball loss?
Keep it short and kind: "I loved watching you play, and I'm proud of how hard you worked." Offer a snack and quiet time. Wait until the next day before discussing what could improve, and let your child lead the conversation.
Should I give feedback right after the game?
Usually not. Emotions are high, and children rarely take in advice straight after a match. Save technical feedback for the next day, ideally as a question such as "What would you like to practise?"
What if my child blames the referee or team-mates?
Listen to the feeling first, then gently steer back to what your child can control. "That sounds frustrating. What could you do next time?" teaches responsibility without a lecture.
How do I stop myself from coaching from the sideline?
Decide before the game what you will say, such as "Go on!" or "Nice work!", and nothing else. Standing with other relaxed parents helps, and so does reminding yourself that the coach has a plan you cannot see.
What if my child does not want to talk about the game at all?
That is fine. Respect the silence, keep the mood warm and try again later, perhaps during a walk or while playing. Some children process things by doing, not talking.
Is it okay to disagree with the coach?
Yes, but do it privately and calmly, at a suitable time, and never in front of your child or the team. Ask questions ("Can you help me understand the plan?") rather than making accusations.
Summary
The best thing you can say after a floorball game is the simplest: that you enjoyed watching and you are proud of the effort. Leave the analysis to the coach, wait a day before technical talk, and use light home sessions to turn mistakes into learning. For more guidance, visit the Floorball Parents hub. Follow us on Instagram @better_floorball for ideas you can share with your child.
